Beer is my Adorno.
We have never been there, Okami. I just thought of that. Oh, no. Once. Xmas party. When we weren‘t we but everyone knows that we were a we. Always have been. Always will be.
That‘s the story, isn‘t it? That‘s why I am starting this chapter adressing you. Being out of the last chapters. No new volumes of C & me for long. Still less than a year. When will it be ok? Like ok ok? We gone from not with you not without you to so totally not with you and without you is only road to take that doesn‘t lead to destruction, pain, insanity and violence. But the heritage of us is still there. Leading to the same things. Only less. Only in the sense that it is bearable. But all is lost. Everything that was ever of any importance. Lost the faith, dead what I once have been. For better in some ways. For worse in others.
I don‘t want to make this about you. The headlines are not yours anymore. Especially not this one. I don‘t want to feel like that. Sick. Beaten. I shouldn‘t. This should be happy & upbeat, looking forward for the things to come. Rock my world. Touch my soul. Make me swoon. Everything there. So the only conclusion I am able to come to: Run. Don‘t get involved. Because this trinity means trouble, doesn‘t it? Either it won‘t touch me, cause there is really nothing to touch anymore. Or it will go down the same road. So seems to be the choice between pain and pain. Why again am I not really capable of letting it go right away? Because it is better to feel pain? So you know you are not dead?
That‘s the story, isn‘t it? That‘s why I am starting this chapter adressing you. Being out of the last chapters. No new volumes of C & me for long. Still less than a year. When will it be ok? Like ok ok? We gone from not with you not without you to so totally not with you and without you is only road to take that doesn‘t lead to destruction, pain, insanity and violence. But the heritage of us is still there. Leading to the same things. Only less. Only in the sense that it is bearable. But all is lost. Everything that was ever of any importance. Lost the faith, dead what I once have been. For better in some ways. For worse in others.
I don‘t want to make this about you. The headlines are not yours anymore. Especially not this one. I don‘t want to feel like that. Sick. Beaten. I shouldn‘t. This should be happy & upbeat, looking forward for the things to come. Rock my world. Touch my soul. Make me swoon. Everything there. So the only conclusion I am able to come to: Run. Don‘t get involved. Because this trinity means trouble, doesn‘t it? Either it won‘t touch me, cause there is really nothing to touch anymore. Or it will go down the same road. So seems to be the choice between pain and pain. Why again am I not really capable of letting it go right away? Because it is better to feel pain? So you know you are not dead?
koneko do - 12. Feb, 18:54
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